Category Archives: Development

Experimenting and Finalising Details

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After planning everything out it was now time to test our ideas in front of an actual audience. Having never done anything like this before we were interested to see how, as the gainers our bodies would react. The gainers were sat down and as I was wearing the more sexual outfit, I was also handcuffed to my seat giving over even more control to my feeder. We then decided to place the audience in a square. We as the gainers were facing them as one side of the square, then they filled the other sides. This ensured everyone could see all angles of the process.                                                           unnamed2

To test what outfits worked best together we decided the feeders would change gainers after a period of time, so all possibilities could be looked at. However, in the actual experiment this will not be the case as a bond will need to be formed between feeder and gainer. My first feeder was more sceptical about how far to push the boundaries. I often found I had to lean my head in rather than feel forced to eat or drink what was in front of me. Personally, I felt as I was giving over complete control some force was needed. As the feeders changed, I found the task more difficult. My third feeder for example put together some interesting food combinations I found hard to stomach. By the end of the process the sickly food almost became too much to handle and that was after only ten minutes of consumption. It seemed the audience reacted well to our own reactions. Some food dripped down and gagging also began as the experiment went on, which when doing a durational piece is sure to happen with this project.

When the experiment ended the audience reacted well to the varied gainer outfits. They liked the fact we were all in different outfits, yet they were all black. However, for the feeder it seemed the best outfit was the server. So, for our final piece we will dress the feeders as waiters, which will be interesting as a waiter wouldn’t normally push the boundary of feeding a consumer. We have also decided everyone will be handcuffed, as those who weren’t often moved their hands without thinking about it. Through all being handcuffed, you will literally be forced to eat and give over complete control.

          (Above: ‘The Set’ and Below: ‘The Gainers’ Taken by Kirsty Jakins:22.11.13)

‘Rituals are more than structures and functions, they are also among the most powerful experiences life has to offer’ (Schechner,2004 ,p70)

After finalising most details within the work in progress, we began to realise how difficult the durational task will be. For the audience it can be seen as a ritual, with the feeder going back and forth and holding the fork to the gainers mouth. It will also be a powerful experience depending on who is chosen for each role. Whatever way it turns out the experiment will be completely different. Some feeders will be more forceful, others more forgiving. Some gainers will be able to stomach more, others may be sick after twenty minutes. It seems this last minute decision will completely change the experiment, and will make the final piece an interesting watch.

Works Cited

Schechner, R. (2004) Performance Studies: An Introduction. London:Routledge.

Force Feeding Relationships…In A Babydoll.

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For our work-in-progress session, we performed a live experiment. Primarily, this was to gage the reaction and reception from the audience, allowing us to alter and change variations within our experiment as was needed. So this experience would be as close to our final piece as possible, and to give an authentic feel to both us as performers and the audience, we drew straws the day before to see who would take which position; the Feeder, or the Gainer. (I use the term Gainer here loosely. We are not eating to gain weight, or for either party to receive sexual pleasure from the act of feeding or being fed. In our experiment, I use the term simply to define the two separate roles).

Once we had drawn straws, and roles were decided, we were able to decide on costume. Our intention of dressing differently was to see which pairing of the Feeder and Gainer went well together; looked more aesthetically pleasing, and whether or not these costumes affected how the audience viewed the piece.

(Experiment in progress: Images by Jakins, Kirsty and Lauren Watson, 22.11.13)

Typically, the Feeder/Gainer relationship is sexual, and although as a group we do not have that sexual attraction or arousal by the concept, we still chose to represented the sexual side of the fetish to see the reactions of our audience. “Theatre is, and has always been, a place which exhibits what a human body is, what it does, what it is capable of” (Sheperd 2006, p. 1), and our experiments embody this idea of the theatre. This experiment is primarily about us exploring our own limitations and relationship towards food, and in doing so our “live performance often does involve the senses in ways that transgress the boundaries of the visually iconic and of the linguistically and musically sonic” (Banes and Lepecki 2007, p. 3). During our short experiment, the Gainers repeatedly gagged, and struggled with the food presented to them. These reactions transgressed those boundaries, not only expected of a performance, but also blurred those of  the private/personal. To gag or be sick is usually a very personal act, and usually brought on by illness. So to show this reaction in public, and from being self-induced by consumption created an entirely new atmosphere and piece for the audience. And because “audience members bring their whole bodies with them into the auditorium, not just their eyes “Ridout 2009, p. 18). their actions and reactions to our physical reactions will be as vital to the experiment as the participants themselves.

(Experiment in progress: Image by Lauren Watson, 22.11.13)

This experiment and our final piece will “reveal histories – they propose practices, privilege materials, mirror social conditions, and implement techniques” (Banes and Lepecki 2007, p. 2). As a UK size 12, weighing 10st 8lb, I am very conscious about my size and weight, more than often feeling uncomfortable in my own skin due to ‘ideals’ on how I should look, and our experiment is causing all of us to look at ourselves and our relation to food in a different light. Our performance shines a light on the often taboo area of ‘Feederism’, a social condition which isn’t highlighted or publicly talked about, and is only really addressed through documentaries. Although we aren’t Feeders and Gainers, we are openly exploring our own boundaries with food. According to Richard Schechner, “performances that insist on sharing experiences with partakers and participants; works that try to evoke both terror and celebration. Such performances are often very personal even as they are no longer private” (2007, p. 25), and our experiment does just this. A marvel at the food we create, and if not a terror in the audience, a horror at what we are attempting to complete.

Works Cited
Banes, Sally, Andre Lepecki (2007) ‘Introduction’ in The Senses in Performance, ed. Sally Banes and Andre Lepecki, Oxon: Routledge, pp. 1-7.
Ridout, Nicholas (2009) Theatre & Ethics, London: Palgrave Macmillan.
Schechner, Richard (2007) ‘Rasaesthetics’ in The Senses in Performance, ed. Sally Banes and Andre Lepecki, Oxon: Routledge, pp. 10-28.
Sheperd, Simon (2006) Theatre, Body and Pleasure, New York: Routledge.

The food experiments

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After it was decided we would be looking into the feeder fetish, we decided to experiment with handing over control and feeding each other. On 7th November 2013 we all bought foods we like and then gave them over to our feeder. One by one we took it in turns to be fed and then become the feeder ourselves. We wanted to all experience the act of giving and receiving the foods we would usually eat ourselves for pleasure. The experience was very odd as the act of feeding is usually a personal act. When I gave up control and Lizzy took the role of feeding me it was very odd. I was fed crisps and cheese-strings.

Feeding/Fed

Giving up control: Taken by Lauren Watson 7 /11/13

Being fed is not an experience I am used to in my every day life, so by giving the personal act of feeding to another was something new. This was the same for the rest of the group and made us think more about those whose fetish involves the act of feeding another/being fed as part a pleasurable experience of everyday life.

As part of our work in progress on 22nd November we decided to use it to our advantage and used it to help us finalise some areas of the performance we were uncertain of. These included the costumes we would wear and the positioning of us and the audience. We set up three chairs for our gainers, decided by the drawing of straws, with a table downstage holding the food and the audience in a thrust style.

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Work in progress: Taken by Kirsty Taylor 22/11/13

Work in progress gainers: Taken by Kirsty Taylor 22/11/13

As we were unsure as to what we should wear we all wore different outfits ranging from underwear to gym wear. We drew straws to decide who would taken on the role of either feeder or gainer. I chose a long straw and so became a feeder. The feeders fed each of the gainers in turn for fifteen minutes and we then received feedback. From this we were able to decide which outfits were received the best and also helped formulate new idea’s regarding audience. We did not expect such wide and interesting reactions from the audience and so we realised that by allowing the audience to see each other as well as the performance it would add to the atmosphere of the piece. It also made us aware of how this piece could also spark thoughts in the audience of their own personal relationship with food and their opinion of how much/little is ‘normal’ to consume.

Comfort Eating.

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For me the feeder/gainer relationship is rather confusing. Firstly, as a 20 year old girl in the 21st century I find that despite my better knowledge, I judge my own appearance against the appearance of other women. At what is apparently an “average” clothing size 12 I spend a lot of my time looking at myself and wishing I could be a bit thinner here, or a bit more toned there. Why? “Advertising and media play an enormous role in perpetuating women’s obsession with thinness. The media constructs idealized images of the thin and well-toned body and also promotes consumer products that help people, especially women, achieve this well-maintained body” (Allen and Sachs, 2007, p. 3).Not only that but  “quick fix” diets, fat burning pills and exercise DVDs are forever thrown in the paths of the self conscious under the pretense that buying their product and following their schemes will guarantee a happier “you”. As Lupton points out “given the current elision of sexual attractiveness with a slim body, many individuals make efforts to conform to this ideal” (Lupton, 1996, p. 137) because while”A slender/attractive body is understood as a healthy, normal body…an obese/ugly body is understood as unhealthy and deviant” (Lupton, 1996, p. 137). Though media and fashion image has changed drastically sinse the publication of Luptons Food, the Body and the Self (1996), it is arguable that opinions on female body image have not changed much. So for me, to see people who want to be fat is a massive contradiction to the social norm.

(Barcroft TV, 2013)

The video above shows a female gainer who is striving to gain weight on a daily basis. Like many other gainer women she feels more attractive in her overweight state than she did when she was a more healthy size. Not only that but she relishes the idea of other people seeing her putting on weight and is of course reaping the financial rewards that publishing her weight gaining gives her.

In a strange way I find myself envious of women like this. Yes, they are over weight, but they are more comfortable in their own skin than many women who strive to be thin. They have pride in their bodies and the confidence to sexualize it, knowing that there are people out there attracted to their fat. They use their weight to their advantage, gaining pleasure not just from eating, but from seeing others get pleasure from their eating; from feeding and having control over it. Some of these women even turn their diet into a business, advertising themselves to the market of punters who find these grandiose women sexy.

Secondly, and indeed predominantly, I find myself somewhat disgusted. Being as obese as many of these gainers are or aim to be goes against all medical knowledge and in my personal opinion common sense. Is it not greedy and unfair that they can eat so much, to the point of gluttony and not spare a thought for the people in the world that could live off of the food they consume in a day, for months? And how is it fair that these women push their bodies to the point that they need the care of others to function on a daily basis?  Why anyone would put their life at such a risk on purpose is beyond my comprehension. Can they not see that they are diminishing both their quality and quantity of life?

I am aware that being as uneducated as I am on the subject it is easy to pass judgement in ignorance. But even if I was knowledgeable on the subject, I am very aware that as I mentioned at the beginning of this post, I am looking at the feeder/gainer phenominon through the eyes of one particular type of person. It just so happens that while we may all take different things from exploring this topic, our performance group all fit a relatively similar demographic; we are all 20 year old, white, westernized women, who have been influenced through various means over our lives to believe that to be fat is to be unattractive. To understand how gainer women feel would be rewriting a life’s worth of understanding of ourselves, our appearance, and societies views on female appearance and attractiveness.

With that in mind, I am stil grappling with the questions of whether it is better to be fat and unhealthy but happy and live a shorter life, or be thinner and insecure, but be healthier and most likely live longer?

Works Cited

Allen, P., & Sachs, C. (2007). Women and food chains: The gendered politics of food. International Journal of Sociology of Food and Agriculture.

Barcroft TV (2013) Big Women Funnel Feeder: BBW Wants To Be As Fat As Possible [Online Video] Available from http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=jfxPWK47eLg [Accessed 21 November 2013].

Lupton, D (1996) Food, the Body and the Self. London: SAGE Publications Ltd.

Who draws the short straw? Work in Progress.

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We met as a group to discuss finalisations for our work in progress performance on the 21.11.13. The first thing we want to test with an audience is what we should be wearing. We decided each feeder and gainer will wear something different for us to see what works most effectively. Secondly, we needed to decide on the high calorie foods we will be bringing in. For our work in progress we chose a few foods known for being treats so we can get the most out of the experiment. Having already planned our set up i.e. where the table of food will be presented and audience sat, it was now time to discover who would be a feeder and who would be a gainer. We wanted to leave this decision until as late as possible, so chose the afternoon before. Below, I will place a video of the straw drawing process where we discovered our fate.

After establishing the roles we will take tomorrow and planning our experiment, hopefully now with an audience to test we can discover what elements to our performance will work most effectively.